A number of people have asked me why the friend with whom I was having lunch on Friday had her own personal arsenal in the backseat of her car.
She is actually a student of Kung Fu, and is about to test for her purple belt.
But the fun did not stop with an inventory of her lethally dangerous back seat. After she finished listing all the weapons with which we were vaguely familiar she told us, “I also used to have a [name of some unpronounceable Chinese weapon] that was really big. I named it My Little Brother but my friend [Important Side Note: a guy friend] told me I had to call it My Johnson.
So the next time I saw him I told him that I hadn’t had any time recently to practice with My Johnson. I totally cracked him up.”
And almost caused a major car accident as the three of us were driving back from lunch at the time, and explosive, convulsive laughter tends to impair one’s ability to drive in a straight line.
Best. Lunch. Ever.
Mary (Mert) says
My Johnson, that is perfect! That is snort worthy 😀
Marvin The Magnificent says
Beats “Mr Pointy” – Buffy The Vampire Slayer’s favorite stake.
yoshi says
Hahaahah, that is hilarious!
I’ll have to be sure to remember to not mess with her in the event that we should ever meet.
John Masters says
Cool story. The only thing that could have made it better was if your friend had some guns in there too.
My Dad was a knife collector, and had an impressive array of them, each and every one was sharp enough to shave with. I’m not exaggerating either. He was a genius at putting an edge on a knife. He didn’t have any swords though, that would have been cool, but then again, one of us 4 kids probably wouldn’t have lived to adulthood if he had swords.
To this day, I carry a plain, high quality, two-blade pocket knife. Every once in a while, someone at work or wherever will remark that they need a knife, and I’ll hand them mine and without exception, people look at me funny. I guess people don’t carry pocket knives much anymore, but I’m my Father’s son.
Now that I think about it, a woman with a sword is every bit as cool as a woman with a gun.